The Good, The Bad & The Fabulous

The Good:

I look nice and "buff" for my trip. Might not have lost as much weight as I wanted, but feeling good about my body.

The Bad:

My car (that was hit by a semi while parked) still isn't fixed. But will be good as new when I get back from vacation. Fingers crossed.

The Fabulous:

The forecast for part of the time I will be in West Palm Beach! Peace out freaders! :)

Because They're THAT Good

Pete Shagman's Famous Breakfast Muffins
I can't take credit for this recipe, but it is one I have to share with all of you. These are the best damn breakfast muffins on the planet. Like, Tater Tot Casserole good. You can quote me on that.

Ingredients:

• Crescent rolls -- I get the round biscuit shaped ones, for ease of use.
• 3-4 eggs -- too many and they puff up too much
• Bacon/Sausage -- about a half a pound, I use maple sausage
• Onion Powder -- teaspoon or two to taste
• Garlic Powder --teaspoon or two to taste
• 6oz Cream Cheese --softened
• Cheddar Cheese -- I use about a half an 8 oz block, cut into 1/4" cubes

Directions

1. Preheat to 375.
2. Cook bacon or sausage and set aside. Flatten crescent rolls and press into Pam'd muffin pans. (Use the big muffin pans)
3. Soften cream cheese and add eggs, garlic salt and onion powder and blend/beat/mix
4. Drop a little bacon/sausage and cheese chunks into crescent cups. Pour egg mixture in, then a little bit more bacon/sausage/cheese chunks on top.
5. Bake for 13-15 minutes or until the centers are NO LONGER JIGGLY! Eggs will start to brown slightly around the edges. Eat warm!

Don't mind my amateur photography.

Yum! And they freeze really well too, had one this morning and put in the microwave for about 45 seconds or so.

Enjoy!

I Can't Believe I'm Posting This On The Internet

Alternately titled: "My 30 Day Shred Results"

Yesterday I hit 30 days straight with the lovely Jillian Michaels as my trainer (via her DVD of course). I have to say I am really glad I stuck with it. I have real muscles. I don't feel like I'm 90 years old after walking up 5 flights of stairs. My asthma is more under control. I'm not winded after a long bike ride (or marathon sex). I could take Jillian Michaels in a fight. OK, maybe not that last one.

I took pictures at the beginning thinking maybe I would post them with after photos. I debated last night and said to myself "Really? Do you really want to post a picture of yourself in a sports bra ON THE INTERNET?!"

But I really, truly believe in this workout plan. I may not have knock-you-out-of-your-seats results. But I have results. After only 30 days. And to me, that's saying something.

Results:
-4 lbs.
-1.5" around waist
-1.25" around hips
-.5" around upper thighs
::I can button a pair of capris I couldn't even fit into last summer
::Yes, I've been "fake and baking" for my upcoming Florida trip
::Yes, that is the same outfit, 30 days later :)





Along with the 30 Day Shred workout, I followed a healthier meal plan: ate a lot of fruits and vegetables, whole grains and organic foods; no fried or fast food; cut down on dairy, enriched flour and processed sugar; increased my protein and fiber intake; and drank lots of water.

[Not saying that there wasn't one Saturday I may have indulged in a large scoop of peanut butter, caramel and chocolate ice cream, but let's just keep that between us.]

So, if you're looking for a workout that you can fit into your day and get results, I would definitely recommend it. I plan on continuing it for another 30 days in fact! Except today. Today, I'm taking a day off in celebration :)

That Time I (Unknowingly) Met A Country Singer*

Scene: My friend and I are walking up to the bar, excited to see a concert of one of my favorite country singers, Craig Morgan. Enter, Guy on Motorcycle (GOM)

GOM: Hey ladies, what's going on here tonight?

Friend: Craig Morgan is having a concert.

GOM: What does he sing?

Both of us: Country music.

GOM: I know, I meant what songs?

(Friend looks at me to answer, since I am the semi-obsessed fan)

Me: Little Bit of Life, International Harvester, God Must Really Love Me

GOM: I see. Hope you girls have a good time!

(We continue on to the entrance of the bar where we see a few security guys chuckling.)

Bouncer: Did you ladies know the guy on the bike?

(We shake our heads no.)

Bouncer: Yeah... that was Craig Morgan.

---

Wow. I have never felt like a bigger dumbass.

Although, in my defense he had on a rather large helmet and aviator sunglasses. And I've only seen him on album covers!

Not as exciting as Katelin meeting Joshua Jackson and announcing her surprise engagement, but I have to work with what I got folks.







Maybe the bouncers were pulling our legs. But really, what male country singer wouldn't approach two ladies who got all dolled up for his concert? :)



*And Was Nearly Trampled For A Guitar Pick

Eighteen Days & Counting...

...until I leave for sunny Florida! West Palm Beach to be exact. I am more than thrilled about this upcoming vacation. We originally planned for a 4 day weekend in Hilton Head to celebrate my friend Heather's birthday, but another friend of mine had connections and we ended up booking a timeshare for an ENTIRE WEEK for under $200!

Rough economy - travel & lodging for under $200 + 7 friends to split everything else with = Michelle still going on vacation!

At a development meeting Heather and I attended last week, it was brought to our attention that we need a theme for our vacation. Thought I'd share with you guys what's in the mix:

• Pimpin' in the Palms '09
• How I Met Your Father
• Hoes Before Bros: WPB Style
• We WILL Shake Our Tail Feathers
  
• Tequila & Triangle Tops Hellz Yeah
• 8 Girls Sure Can Pimp Out a Mini Van
• West Palm Biotches: We're a "Shore" Thing

Hilarious, right? Feel free to throw out your ideas, I know how creative you guys are! The best part? I'm planning on getting tank tops made once we decide. They're going to be so surprised*.

This vacation has been all I can think about lately, as you can probably tell from my tweets, Facebook status messages, new bathing suit and sundress purchases, increased workouts and well, this post. I will be pinching myself until I'm actually on the plane! Have any of you ever been to West Palm Beach? Any nightlife suggestions or other must-sees?


Yes, I bought 2 of the same dress in different colors. How could you not for $10.50? Thank you, Forever 21.


*You know, if I actually design them in time.

If I've Heard It Once, I've Heard It A Thousand Times

And I heard it all weekend long.

"Hey, you'd look good with one of those."

Really? My ovaries had no idea. Talk to me again in 5 years.

(But really, my niece is cuter than your niece.)

My Newest Crush

My heart broke a little when I heard that Vince Vaughn, my celebrity crush, recently got engaged. I pouted, tweeted about it... then last night, I moved on.



Jason Segel? Delicious.

You could say my crush started back a year ago when I was obsessively renting seasons of the television show How I Met Your Mother from Blockbuster Online. I'm surprised an error message didn't pop-up, "Dude, you have exceeded the rental limit for this series. Get a life." But my heart belonged to Vince.

Well, that all changed. Last night I saw I Love You, Man. A new movie starring Paul Rudd and Jason Segel. First of all, I laughed so hard my sides still hurt hours later and humor is definitely one of the pathways to my heart. You know, right after cheesecake and foot massages.

Secondly, he just seems like one of those celebrities that would be awesome in real life. Down-to-earth, laugh at your jokes, play Guitar Hero with you. Know what I mean?

And then there's the hair.



*sigh*

The Proof Is In The Pudding

I swear Peter, it was me*.



If you didn't see my Twitter sneak peek, here is my full St. Patty's Day get-up. And boy did we have a blast!

Did you drink green beer this year?

*and yes, I'm actually Irish

The Douche Pickle Discussion

When girls get together to gossip there are no holds barred. Pretty much anything is up for discussion. Guys, you've probably heard about this and it's one thing that is 100% true (and yes, we do talk about size). We might also bring up your third nipple, Transformers tattoo, how you had something in between your teeth at dinner, that you use the word 'pumpkin' or 'schnookums', that you were clung to us like a dryer sheet by the fifth date, and everything else you hoped stayed a secret. It's just what girls do.

But lately, in my circle of friends, the conversation always winds up about douche pickles. Since we have so much fun talking about them, I thought I'd share the terminology with you.

Generally speaking, a douche pickle (or DP) is a guy who acts a fool. But this can be broken down into different categories. There are guys who act a fool because of you. This type of DP makes a fool of himself because he is really into you. Then there are guys who act a fool repeatedly because they are just not good guys. This type of DP is more deceptive and if you're not careful can wind up making a fool out of you.

I seem to have more of a problem with the deceptive DPs. The ones who charm you, get to know you, and only when they have you completely convinced that they're a good guy, you are hit with DP behavior. I know DPs are never boyfriend material, but a lot of times they're too cute to resist.

Examples of DP behavior that have happened to me and/or friends of mine recently:

• keeping you secret from friends/family
• only hanging out on your side of town
• having a 'girlfriend'
• 4-5 days without any sort of communication and no clear explanation why
• picking you up for dinner, paying and then specifically not using the word "date"
• calling you on Thursday night to make plans for the weekend and expecting you to be free
• making comments about your guy friends
• criticizing the way you wear your hair, decorate your apartment or organize your shoes
• not calling 'the day after'

I could go on, but I think you're getting the picture. Now you know when to properly use the phrase and can have as much fun as we do saying the words 'douche pickle'!

Girls, do you and your girlfriends use any other fun phrases when talking about guys?

Guys, don't be offended, I know you're not all DPs ;)


"And then I said to that DP..."

And The Winner Was...

#2!



And I think it went over rather well...

Thanks guys!

Let's Play Dress Up

Hey ya'll I need your help!

I have a date tonight, and though I've breezed thru quite a few lately, I cannot decide for the life of me what to wear! Maybe it's the new hair, or maybe it's because I went shopping over the long weekend and have TONS of new options ;)

Things to keep in mind:

• Casual dinner date, think Max & Erma's/Olive Garden-esque
• It might rain, but will be in the high 80s
• I have red hair now! Will orange/pink clash?
• When we first met, I was wearing a dress so I'm sort of hesitant to wear one again. Silly?

Vote in the comments!

---

Option #1
Floral halter top, khaki capris and bronze thong sandals




Option #2
Black polka dot top, jean skirt and black belted sandals




Option #3
Bright green halter dress and tan heeled sandals




Option #4
Orange tube top, pink and orange plaid walking shorts and brown flip flops




Option #5
Floral blouse, brown dress capris and brown heeled sandals



So, what should I wear?


Also, Jesse?! DeAnna picked Jesse on the final episode of the Bachelorette!
Jason, if you're reading this, call me! ;)

Just Call Me Vixen

vix·en /ˈvɪksən/ [vik-suhn] –noun 1. a female fox.

---

Yes guys, I went red. And some of you know what that means...

The fierce, fiery Michelle is back in full force. Watch out!

The most common reaction from friends?

"What boy pissed you off this time?"

The reality?

It tends to attract more of them... ;)



What crazy things have you guys been up to lately?

Gay, Straight, Or Taken?

The age old question every single girl asks herself when she sees hottie material. (It's also a reality dating show on Lifetime, quite lame, but gets the point across.)

In the real world, it's not as simple as picking the straight available man, however. There are many sub-categories your potential suitor could fall into that parallel hiding his wedding ring in his back pocket. I will detail below a few I have encountered myself in recent dating escapades (all of which you will want to AVOID at all costs):

---

The wallflower: He's usually alone at the bar. Leaning against the wall, beer in hand, watching you from afar. He may shift positions to get closer to where you're seated. You smile, he winks. But when you make eye contact for too long he looks away, fearful that you may have caught him checking out your cleavage. When your friend makes a trip to the restroom, the empty chair... remains empty.

• Why you want to steer clear: If he can't grow a pair and actually TALK to you, who's going to be making all the moves in bed? Sounds like too much work if you ask me.

The smooth-talker: He brings his A-game round one. "You have a beautiful smile" is his leading line. Not lame, but not sleazy either. It's easy to fall for his quick wit and irresistible charm. By the end of the night, he thinks he has this one in the bag.

• Why you don't want to go back to his place: His A-game will only last that one round. The sweet compliments and tender kisses are out the window on date #2. He's the guy who likes to hit it and quit it. If you know what I mean...

The booty call: This guy will usually be with a bunch of friends at the bar. A crowd pleaser. Normally gathered around the pool table, arcade bowling machine or dart board. He'll ask you to join in, this way the whole group can flirt with you. He doesn't seem to mind that you're getting everyone else's attention.

• Why you shouldn't hand out the digits: This guy isn't interested in a serious relationship. He thinks you have a nice ass and would be fun to make out with. His calls will consistently come Sunday evenings after 10 p.m. or after a late night at the strip joint.

The extracurricular overachiever:: In conversation you find out that after his 9-5, he works a second job three times a week. He seems put-together, determined, with a good head on his shoulders. He then goes into detail about his many hobbies: biking, golf, hiking, the two softball leagues he plays for every week. How he barely has time for sleep, and comes home to Conan O'Brien every night.

• Why you shouldn't pencil him in for a date: Don't get me wrong, it's nice when your significant other has a life outside of you. If I didn't have my weekly date nights with Anna, happy hours with different friends, volunteer work or (soon-to-be) golf lessons, I would be a pretty boring person. But, with a life as jam packed as his seems, you will find it impossible to squeeze into his routine. And besides, where does sex fit in to that schedule of his? Dead last. RUN.

And finally,

The over-exaggerator: Constantly references his many "achievements". How he turned down Harvard to stay close to home and care for his elderly relative or neighbor. That he could have taken that fantastic corporate job right out of college that paid six figures, but it was his dream to Save Darfur.

• Why you should avoid a kiss from those tainted lips: With so many lies escaping that dirty mouth of his, how will you ever know where it's really been? And girls, if he's not being up front about something as simple as what he does for a living, should you believe it when he tells you he's pleased every woman he's ever been with? I think not.

---

Have any categories of your own to share?

Oh, and just in case you fear you won't be able to resist guys like the ones mentioned above due to their six pack abs, cute dimples, nice ass or fabulous head of hair; simply wear this t-shirt:



Because you're worth it ;)

Happiness Is...

• finally spending time with my niece outside of the hospital
  
  
• a So You Think You Can Dance marathon with the best friend ever
  
• wine & pizza, yeah we're classy like that
  
• a wii bowling tournament
  
• dancing with "the baby" to cell phone ring tones
  
• knowing tomorrow is FINALLY Friday
  
• having a jam-packed weekend scheduled
  
• receiving text messages that are too cute for words
  
• when you CAN'T STOP smiling :)

What has made you guys happy lately? Fill me in!

My Birthday In Numbers (And Pictures)

I have come to realize I am truly lucky. I have some of the best friends in the world, spread out far and wide. I love each and every one of you. THANK YOU for making my birthday unforgettable.

1 Flower delivery

• I was SHOCKED by this delivery at work! Aren't they gorgeous? Thank you to my other half, you are truly amazing. (And how did you know that was one thing a guy's NEVER done for me?)
  
  
  
  

1 Care package

• From my long time friend Rachel. Love you girl!
  
  

2 E-cards
3 Glasses of wine
4 Pieces of flair
5 E-mails
6 Facebook messages
8 Birthday cards
9 Phone calls
12 Text messages
25 Years under my belt
26 Sexual favors
36 Facebook wall posts
75 Blog comments
200 dollars in spending $
Tons of Birthday wishes

Not to mention:

• A stick of gum (inside joke)
  
• Lunch at Noodles
  
• Ice Cream at Jeni's
  
• Happy Hour and drinks with friends/co-workers
  
• Homemade Birthday dinner with the bestest (which included CHEESECAKE! does she know me or what?)
  
• Dinner tonight with my lovely hometown ladies
  
• A new birthday outfit worn with a pair of HOTT red pumps!
  
  

WHAT A DAY!

A Tribute

To a friend that has been:

My shoulder to cry on.
My voice of reason.
My boost in confidence.
My comic relief.


June 2008, Celebrating our birthdays at Max & Ermas :)

Anna,

I don't think I could ever truly express to you how much your friendship means to me. You welcomed me into your home last year when I couldn't face my own. Even though you have a husband and child to care for, you have always made room for me in your life.

You listened to me sob on your back porch last fall and again a month ago without ever saying "I told you so". You were the friend that helped me bounce back when I first saw her with him, dragging me out and telling me not to let this bring me down (and not caring how many times I played Carrie Underwood on the juke box). You encouraged me to start dating again and didn't criticize me when I played with fire. You giggled right along with me to text messages, glad to see me smiling.

You agreed that now I need to focus on me and I'm not afraid to be without a "special someone" because you're only a 5 minute drive away. Thanks for being my So You Think You Can Dance buddy. A guaranteed spot on your couch every week to feed my obsession. Thank you in advance for spending my birthday with me tomorrow. My first birthday "alone" will go down in the history books as a night filled with so much dancing it made our heads spin.

Some day I hope to be half the mom that you are. You are raising a fantastic little boy with a big personality. His smile has brightened many a day for me lately (and his "WOW"s and "Dude"s). Oh, and by the way, I'm sorry for his new obsession with sunglasses ;)

You are a wonderful friend. Thank you for being there for me when I needed someone the most. I hope you know I would do the same for you in a heartbeat.

I love you girl!

~Michelle

p.s. Wii bowling rematch?


Christmas 2006, you were pregnant with Drew then! It doesn't seem like that long ago does it?

New Life, New Beginnings

As some of you already know, on Friday afternoon, my niece was born. My weekend plans to stay in Columbus for Memorial Day quickly changed and after a night of drunken debauchery on Friday (which will be discussed later), I headed to Erie and Buffalo.



My niece's name is McKenzie Marie (or M&M for short) and she was born one month prematurely weighing 5 lbs. even. She is still in the NICU so our contact with her was brief, but she is doing well. Hopefully, the proud parents will be able to bring her home soon.

I did learn one thing this weekend: my brother is going to make an awesome dad. He was so attentive to his daughter. Kissing her forehead constantly, which made her face scrunch up every time - it was adorable. I hope when I find my future husband, he loves kids as much as Kyle does.



My brother's description of the birth (which was REALLY quick):

"She came out, said ABC, 123, hand me my backpack I'm ready for school." He even added in the little motion like she was throwing the book bag over her shoulder. Hilarious.



I can't wait to watch her grow up, and be a part of her life. It's going to cost me a fortune in gas, but I'm going to visit all the time!

Remedies For Heartache

A bakesale...


A new scent...


A new pair of shoes...


And best of all, a new 'do!



Still pondering yesterday's post. Don't worry - I'll let you guys know what I decide.

Straight To My Thighs

But, OH MY GOD, when you open the bag the smell is spot on.

A Good Hair Day

There's just something about getting your hair just right that puts an extra bounce in your step. Know what I mean? I'm having one of those days today and after spending some quality time with the beau, I am in a fabulous mood.

"New" steam curlers from Clancy's mom this weekend. They're old school but seriously they work better than any curlers I've ever used before.



Rollers in...



Makes for a great hair day!



Off to work in style. And in a new print dress ;)



Oh and another thing that can make your day? Packages. Got Trish's book in the mail, can't wait to crack it open. Oh the perks of knowing the author! Thanks for the copy and congrats on it hitting shelves early!