Monday, December 17, 2007

Love And Hate

Love: My surprise date with GQ on Friday night. Seriously how great is he? After the horrible day I had I couldn't have asked for a better way to end my evening. He took me to see the Christmas light show at the local zoo. Holding hands, snuggling to keep warm, making fun of my love of manatees as a kid (he even offered to replace the earrings I used to have when he saw some in the gift shop!), and sharing a kiss while looking out over the pond. So romantic.
Hate: That I'm still a little hesitant to start a relationship with him, even though he's damn near perfect. What if I'm not ready yet, but don't want to let go of such a catch?!

Love: Nearly finished my Christmas shopping today with Kari. I was getting a little nervous, it's NEXT WEEK!
Hate: Burning my tongue on my hot apple cider we got at Cup O Joes.

Love: Frosted pumpkin cookies from Cheryl's Cookies.
Hate: It seems like all weekend I have consumed nothing but junk!

Love: Flirty texts from FF.
Hate: That it's been 5 days since I saw him last.

Love: My work holiday party last Thursday was a huge success. We had a band play (The Menus) and I designed souvenir t-shirts that everyone loved. We even had glow necklaces and straws to add to the concert feel of the evening. I have never seen so many attorneys let loose!
Hate: They cut us off from the hard stuff at 6:00! At least there was still wine.

Love: Getting Christmas cards in the mail from friends and family.
Hate: That I was too lazy and Scrooge-like this year to send out any of my own.

Love: How much blogging has helped me get all my thoughts out in the open since the breakup. I can look back and see how far I've come.
Hate: That I haven't had the motivation lately to blog. I can't pinpoint why.

Love: My friends Sarah & Anna talking me down off of the emotional ledge that was Friday afternoon.
Hate: That I let him get to me. That I let thoughts of him ever come back into my mind. That I picked up that damn phone. It's OVER Michelle, he's moved on. So should you.

47 comments:

graffiti.girl.designs said...

moving on takes time and you are doing so well. don't beat yourself up.

i want to see your cool design for your t-shirts.

i still need your new address :)

i've never, ever been the first person to comment on your blog. yay!

Sarah said...

I am a scrooge too. I get these wonderful cards and I am all, ahhh, so cute, must be expensive.

Miss A said...

Love: That there are still TWO decent guys left in the world.

Hate: That they are in the US and I am in Australia.

Anonymous said...

6 pm?! really?!?! that's nuts! and ugh i hate when i burn my tongue...which i normally do, esp. at lunches seeing as i have what works out to be a net of TEN MINUTES to inhale my food.

courtney said...

love: when michelle blogs!
hate: hmm... got nothing.

:)

YAY for GQ. Just take it slow. Sounds like you have a good thing going.

Eyes As Windows said...

Don't worry about liking GQ. If you like him, don't miss out on him, but you don't have to rush either. Take your time, sounds like you guys are sorta dating right now? Good luck girl!

Susie said...

Moving on takes time...I won't even tell you how many months it took me to stop picking up the phone. And though you might hit some rough spots, it sounds like you're doing an awesome job moving on!

I <3 Cheryl's cookies!

Miriam D said...

I am feeling the same way about blogging lately... I feel like I'm boring everyone. However, I loved the idea of this post, and I'm not gonna lie, I kinda want to steal it!

Jess said...

Hey. So. Based on what I just experienced and what you just experienced - take your damn time. Don't worry about hurting his feelings. If it's right, you have all the time in the world. And if it's not, at least you didn't get too intense with him too soon to make it hurt all the more.

Things look bright, despite the fall back onto C's phone, but you can always pick yourself up. And if nothing else, I'll be using you as a guide on how to do it.

Scotty said...

What if I'm not ready yet, but don't want to let go of such a catch?!

Trust your heart. Take life as it comes. Do what you are afraid to do. Don't think too much. Don't look back.

Anonymous said...

I know, it's crazy that Christmas is next week. How does it always sneak up on us so fast?

Just follow your gut instinct and remember that you are the most important thing right now. Big hugs.

Eleni Zoe said...

The fact that you picked up on the phone just means you're human. You've been soooo well, don't let this one teeny setback cloud the fact that you've come so far in such a short time.

Also, in the words of Morcheeba (God, I love this song!) Fear can stop you loving. Love can stop your fear.

:)

Anonymous said...

Such a cute date. An old boyfriend and I did something like that. We went to the planetarium for the Christmas show and he bought me a rock ring to remember it..Cute boys.

Passionista said...

The good thing is that for every negative there is a positive! And I think your positives far out weight the bad :)

L Sass said...

Go easy on yourself about getting over C, getting into something new with GQ, etc... This is a good time to be selfish and make yourself happy, no matter what it is!

Stephanie said...

I think your "loves" totally outweigh your "hates". The Friday night date sounds perfect. And we all get into blogging slumps. Ever since NaBloPoMo, I've felt a pressure to post something, anything, but I'm sure the lack of motivation will pass.

Stephanie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Love: You, oh so much!
Hate: That I couldn't join you and Kari Christmas Shopping.

I'm seriously pouting, stomping my foot and screaming "IT'S NOT FAIR!"

tiff said...

I think your last hate answers your first hate. Don't worry, the moving on will come.

Jamie Lovely said...

Aw! I want to go to the zoo and cuddle and hold hands. Such a good date!

Anonymous said...

I, too, love getting Christmas cards in the mail. I, also, was too Scrooge-like this year to send them out myself. Next year, I promise!

Breakups suck hard. Don't pick up the phone for him anymore! Besides, GQ? Totally sounds sweet. You may not be ready to be his "girlfriend" yet, but have fun and see where it goes!

Jess said...

I think the love outweighs the hate in this edition, by far. GQ sounds great.

megabrooke said...

here's to holiday parties, flirty texts from cute men, and taking a blogging break (if you need one!), because ive been feeling less than pumped lately about it all too. tis the season i think!

Annie said...

Something that helped me a lot during my last break up (besides my wonderful friends, which it sounds like you have plenty of!) was finding ways to remind myself that I didn't deserve to be with someone who didn't want to be with me. It was harsh, but man, it worked!

I am so, so jealous of your zoo date!

Anonymous said...

Yay for surprise dates! I'm so glad things are going so well for you. And also, thanks for the MySpace Happy Birthday!

:)

Anonymous said...

Don't be too hard on yourself - it's hard to move on and sometimes we need to be reminded how important it is that we do so - I am glad you had a fun time at the zoo seeing all the lights - how sweet and wodnerful that must have been!

nicole antoinette said...

You don't have to rush things with GQ to be with him. From all of the great things you've said about him, I'm sure he's more than willing to take it slow and just see where it goes.

Your loves are much more powerful than your hates, and that's always a good sign. :)

Anonymous said...

hi!

i'm just going to go there, yes? there being me asking you if you know how many good things i've heard about you/your blog from, well, like everyone? i'm so glad i've finally gotten my lazy, S.A.D. afflicted self over here - your blog is wonderful and i am so keeping up with it now ;)

there's so many things i could comment on (i? am long winded) but i'll just say that this :: Love: How much blogging has helped me get all my thoughts out in the open since the breakup. I can look back and see how far I've come. Hate: That I haven't had the motivation lately to blog. I can't pinpoint why. :: is so true.

i normally have to stop myself from posting twice a day (like nicole, i have a thing about this) ... but lately, not so much. maybe it's the S.A.D. the cure? has to be those frosted pumpkin cookies.

- damsel in digress
www.damselindigress.wordpress.com

Ashley said...

You can take things slow with GQ, move at your own pace and soon enough you'll be right where you want to be and it'll be right for you.

And don't beat yourself up, we all have our own moments of weakness every once in a while and we're allowed them. It happens, we move on. You seem to be doing awesomely :-)

xoxo!

Gretta James said...

You seem to be doing pretty dog on well to me chick. And I love reading your blog I totally relate to what you've been going through.

Gretta x

Nic (NotPerfect) said...

I have nothing wise to say other than don't be too hard on yourself. It happens. the whole thing JUST took place. How can you possibly be expected to completely rearrange your life and have your feelings all fixed at the same time? It takes time, so give yourself some freedom to recover.

Angela Noelle said...

You are doing so incredibly well--I'm so proud of you! And it sounds like you've found a great guy, but no need to pressure yourself. If he's cool with not having a label attached for a little while longer, give yourself the time you need to decide if you want a relationship right now or not.

Keep hanging in there, and just hug those girls that are there for you when you have the slip ups. That's what friends are for!

Anonymous said...

I heart The Menus! And I heart your blog.

k said...

no cards for me either. i didn't have time to make any and i couldn't bring myself to buy any after so many years of homemade cards. i am thinking i might attempt new years cards instead!

totally do not beat yourself up. i broke up with my ex 4 months ago, and while i thought i was better before - it wasn't until this week that i realize that i am truly ready to move on. you can't rush it. it takes time to get the emotional closure you need.

Wendy said...

take it easy with GQ, you don't have to rush anything. :)

t.b.f.love. said...

Can I just say that those frosted pumpkin cookies sound like the most delicious thing in the world right now? And I've consumed almost nothing but junk since Thanksgiving; luckily, I think that phase is starting to pass...mmm cookies - I mean, salad. Mmm salad.

Lisa said...

I ALWAYS burn my tongue with hot beverages. Seriously people, serve them at a lower temperature. And then the skin starts to peel? Totally nasty.

Liz said...

Just take it easy with GQ. No pressure. Getting over someone takes time.

Katelin said...

_I think you should go at whatever pace you need to with GQ, I would definitely not rush at all.

_Cheryl's cookies are the most amazing things ever.

_Woo fun holiday parties!

_Yay for friends to be there for you when you need them and it's quite alright to have emotional breakdowns.

Hope your week gets better :)

marisa rose said...

Offered to replace your manatee earrings? HOT!

erin said...

sounds like a good weekend (I too had a lot of junk)!

the date sounds so cute! i love it!

Julie Q said...

don't worry- everyone goes through those times where you don't feel like blogging (happens to the best of us!)

Yoda said...

You could take things a bit slow with GQ ... you could let him know that you need some time but like him!

Seriously, I'm waaayyy behind on the cards too. When is last mail before christmas?

Valley Girl said...

Don't feel bad. I was too lazy to send out cards, too.

amy grace said...

awe loooove this post.
hatttee that it ended :)

hope you are doing ok!!!

i had somewhat of an emotional break down sunday night as the ex had taken down all pictures of me off his myspace...i mean, duh, that's fine, but it was still hard. :-/

Maxie said...

I hate burning my tongue! It ruins all the food i eat for a couple days :-(

Unknown said...

Seriously, the zoo is one of my favorite places. What a great date?! But I understand your hesitation. Nothing wrong with taking things slowly.