Thursday, February 7, 2008

It's A Girl!

So I found out that my brother and his girlfriend are having a girl! I'm going to have a niece!!! And she's due right around my birthday so that's exciting too.

Holy cow my little brother is going to be a dad...



I don't know why but this whole situation makes me feel ancient. Grown up. Is this really happening? I guess I always thought I'd be the first. The first to settle down. Get married. Have children. I don't want to say I'm jealous, because the situation for him isn't ideal and I'm nowhere near ready for that kind of responsibility, but it just feels odd. Why is it that we believe our lives and the lives of the people we love have to follow a certain path and if we stray off that path things just don't seem right?

I remember the call when he first told me he was going to be a father. I was sitting on the bed watching something on TV, drinking a caramel apple spice from Starbucks that Clancy had brought home for me, unsure of where my life was headed. I was sad about the breakup, sad that he may never be part of my life again. There I was being selfish, thinking about me while my brother was probably nervous, scared and excited all at the same time. I wasn't there for him like I should have been and I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for the reaction I had.

"Did you guys plan this? What are you going to do?"

Horrible, right? That was months ago, and we've had conversations about it since. I've been the supportive sister and aunt-to-be that I should have been in that first phone call. I've told him I'll support him and his new family as much as I possibly can. I've told him I'll be the best godmother that anyone could ask for. Because I will.

I love my brother to death and I can't wait to share in this huge moment in his life. I will be right by his side as fast as my Scion will take me when I get that phone call. And you know what? I can't wait.

50 comments:

theselittlemoments said...

Yay! Congrats future Auntie! xoxo

lspoon said...

I've always wanted to be an Aunt before I'm a mother. I can't wait to have my own kids, but I really want to practice first :)

Congratulations. I cannot wait for the cutey patooties pictures!

each of the two said...

wowee, babies are everywhere!

graffiti.girl.designs said...

aww yay!

aunite michelle - nice ring to it!

DG said...

Yay to being an aunt! And a girl? Could it be more perfect??

Banana said...

I had a VERY similar situation with my little brother - unplanned pregnancy, too young to be parents. And I felt exactly like you did. It's not mean, it's being the loving, protective older sister. Also, just like you, I got over it and now that my nephew is here I can't believe there was ever a time when we thought it was a bad idea.

Congratulation Michelle! Being an aunt is the best.

Jess said...

I think my sister might feel sort of the same way, although her situation is a little different. She was always on that planned path, got married first, bought a house, made more money than I did, etc. Then I got engaged and got a great job and now she's getting divorced and will probably need to sell her place. In the meantime I will most likely wind up having kids before her. It's just such a change for her from what she always expected, especially since she's the older one.

I can totally understand how you feel, is my point. I think it's totally natural. And I'm glad that now you're excited to be an aunt. You'll be great!

Surfergrrl said...

Congrats on being an aunt!! I think aunts have the best of both worlds. You get to enjoy the kid, but give it back to the parents when you can't handle it anymore.

I also understand that when you hear news like this, you seem to automatically benchmark your own life with everyone elses. I struggle with this too, and being 37 and single...it's sometimes hard not to "compare."

tiff said...

Yea, aunt Michelle!

[google reader didn't even tell me you had a post! grrrr]

Trish Ryan said...

You'll love Aunt life...it's fantastic. And don't worry about your first reaction, because it won't matter at all once the little peanut is born. Do you have any idea how much fun it is to shop in the little girl section of the store? Honey, you're in for a treat :)

Deutlich said...

There are days where I wonder which of us will have kids first (by us, I mean my brother and me)... and sometimes I think it'll be him even though he's 3 years younger and it's all sort've surreal, isn't it? Either way, CONGRATULATIONS! Because Auntie-to-be? All sorts of exciting!

Annie said...

Fun! Exciting! Don't blame yourself too much... hearing your younger bro is going to be a Papa is shocking news. Sounds like you've talked to him since and he's understanding and everything's great!

The Dutchess of Kickball said...

No matter how or when it happens, it is a blessing, and the instant you see that tiny baby the world changes, if it is your baby or a niece. I can't imagine my life anymore with my nieces and nephew.

Scotty said...

Congrats!

I have a younger sister, and if she were to have a kid, I too would feel ancient :)

janet said...

I know I will flip when the day comes that my sister tells me she is pregnant. And she's been married for like 4 years! I just think it's still shocking, you know? I still think of us as so young.

Actually, when she told me she was getting married (age 20) I totally flipped and wasn't very nice. But I felt bad about that later and came around.

Larissa said...

My husband's sister just announced that she's having a baby. We're so excited about being an uncle and aunt...all the fun and none of the responsibility. WooWoo!

tshirtandjeans said...

toootally know the gambit of emotions you're feeling... my sister just had her second baby a week ago.

she's 21.

Angela said...

The joy of being an aunt is second only to being a grandparent, I think. You get to love the baby, squeeze the baby, play with the baby, and then GIVE THE BABY BACK!!

Jamie Lovely said...

Aunt Michelle! Aw! I foresee you being the awesome aunt that takes her shopping and spoils her rotten.

Baby clothes are so much fun too!

k said...

yay!

my brother had an unplanned baby when he was just 21. it wasn't an ideal situation, but it has all worked out so perfectly and i have an adorable almost 4 year old nephew now who is loved by some many people.

being an aunt is great. all the fun of babies and none of the responsibility!

JulyBug said...

I SO understand where you're coming from. My sister is 22, pregnant, and going through this without a significant other. Not ideal, but hey, what are you going to do but spoil the kid rotten. I can't wait, we find out next Friday if its a boy or girl. Everyone hopes its a girl, so it'll obv be a boy.

Andrea said...

That is so awesome! Can you imagaine BEING pregnant. I freak out every day :D

JP said...

I speak with almost a year's experience: Being an aunt is the best thing ever. Congratulations and enjoy the deliciousness of a baby girl.

Hazel said...

congrats on the news!

and i totally know how you're feeling about being the oldest and thinking you should be the first to do everything. for some reason, i have this irrational fear of my middle sister getting married before me and i hate it! I've always wanted to be the first and if i'm not, i may freak out.

Katelin said...

I had a similar reaction when my best friend told me she was pregnant and I felt pretty bad. Luckily time passed and I finally came to terms with her life and have been nothing but supportive and her son is one of the greatest kids there is.

And congrats on a baby girl to come!

Stephanie said...

Exciting! I'm a step-aunt to two little nieces and oh my lord, now I want a baby. You will make a wonderful aunt!

Yoda said...

I can't believe my little sister is getting married this year! How time flies.

Is your bro back in Eerie?

Vanessa said...

Congrats to you! Girls are so much fun!

Julie Q said...

awww congrats! you HAVE to be the fun aunt that spoils her rotten :)

Maria said...

congratulations, auntie!

Susie said...

Aww that's a tough situation and I'm sure you have many different emotions.

It's SO good you're being happy for him and supportive of him. There's nothing like sibling love :)

thestoryofagirl said...

I have a sister that's like 15-20 years older than I am (My mom has a very sordid history). She's pretty great, and baby-sitted us when we were little. I remember when she had her first daughter. I'm not very involved in their lives, but I love them. They now have 2 beautiful daughters, and I wish so badly I could see them more often. My hope for you is that you just love her. Always be there for her when she needs you. That's the best thing you can do for her.

ttcmb said...

Congratulations on being an Auntie!

Miss A said...

I am an Aunty to a niece too. It will transform your life in the happiest way possible and you will ever wonder what you ever did with all your spare money and spare cash before her.

Congratulations Michelle xx

puremotif said...

i don't blame you too much for your reaction, because i think it was a natural one due to the circumstances surrounding it and the shock, as well as what you were going through at the time. but since you've revised it now and talked to him about it - don't beat yourself up anymore.

that being said, congrats to your brother on the little girl, i pray she is healthy!

pessimisticredhead said...

My little brother had a baby way too young and I was sad until, oh, the moment I saw Super Nephew. Now he's 5 and he is such a blessing to me and my family. You are going to have SO much fun. Congrats!

ashley said...

You're gonna love it. Little girls are the best. She really will be a handful but that is what is wonderful about just being the aunt. Ha. I love it.

MrsTwink said...

I totally understand what you mean! My SIL is pregnant and it kind of freaks me out.

Although I wasn't very excited for their pregnancy since I don't think they have the means to support a baby and will just rely heavily on their own parents but... they're happy.

I still think babies are weird though.

Rebecca said...

I'm sure this brings up tons of emotions for you. Sounds like you reacted pretty normally and that now you are ready to embrace this little sweat potato when she arrives. Congrats!

Passionista said...

Don't beat yourself up over having that reaction, I think it is natural to have those concerns, especially for your little brother. As big sisters, it is our job to worry. I always tell people, jokingly, if my brother (15) or my sister (10) get married before me I'll be upset. Even if they were closer to my age, I still might feel funny at first.

L Sass said...

Being an aunt is going to be so great!! AS's brother has three kids and I LOVE being a pseudo-aunt to them. I wish I had a niece or nephew of my own.

...except that my only sister lives in a hut in Namibia, so I guess I'm glad she doesn't have kids.

sparkel said...

Aw congrats on becoming an Aunt!

Also, you have a scion?? I'm jealous!

A Margarita said...

Awww, BABIES! We want pics. Also, is it bad that I still get more ga-ga over puppies than babies?

Nilsa S. said...

hey - we both wrote about our brothers today! and i can totally relate about having a less than enthusiastic reaction at first. i was the same way with my brother. but, you have the right attitude now. and i'm sure you'll make a fabulous aunt!

Marriage-101 said...

I'm horrible at responding to unexpected baby news. So I feel your pain.

Auburn Kat said...

I know exactly what you mean!! We think our life will turn out a certain way and when it doesn't, it can be really difficult to handle. I thought I would spend the rest of my life with my ex and it broke my heart when I found out that was not in the cards for me.

Ashley said...

AMEN to trying to know where life is going to take you, only to have it do something completely different.

I don't think your response when you first found out was bad, more like concerned, because you know him.

Congrats Auntie!! You are going to have a blast spoiling her, buying little clothes, shoes! :)

Princess Pointful said...

What an exciting new stage in life for the both of you :)

Sara said...

Oooooooh congrats all around!! :)

elysa said...

hello budget ... make room for pink baby clothes! you will be a fabulous auntie michelle