Thursday, March 13, 2008

Consequence Free

I want to eat an entire sleeve of Thin Mint Girl Scout cookies and not gain a pound.

I want to test my car's fabulous horsepower at 80 mph and not get a speeding ticket.

I want to skip paying my rent this month in order to update my wardrobe and not get evicted.

I want to tell a girl I don't like very much that she sucks donkey balls and not get bitch slapped.

I want to stay out late, drink my cares away and not feel it the next morning.

I want to shout from the mountaintops how I feel about about this election and not offend anyone.

I want to punch Eliot Spitzer in the face (because apparently his wife won't) and not get arrested.

I want to wear my heart on my sleeve and not worry about getting hurt.


I wanna be consequence free*. Don't you? And what would you want to do?

*See sidebar for song inspiration, I heart Great Big Sea.

I almost forgot! I have written a post over at genpink.com. An ABC series on 20something life is going on over there and I took on "K is for Kitchen". I'm such a guest posting machine this week!

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

I want to tell my old college to leave me alone and she actually do it. :)

The Southern Belle said...

I want to be able to buy and unlimited amount of shoes and not care about the price or where I would put them.

I want Sallie Mae (the student loan company) to leave me the fuck alone.

I want to date Idris Elba and eventually marry him.

Anonymous said...

I want to eat a pint of Jeni's ice cream and not gain a pound or feel sick (If you haven't tried it, you MUST!)

I want to skip Easter at home with my parents

Anonymous said...

I feel you on every single one. Except Eliot. I don't know who that is. And donkey balls? Ha! Haven't heard that in a while. Love it.

Anonymous said...

I want to not go to work but still get paid for doing 8 hours of it.

I want the power of teleportation so that I don't have to sit in a car with my MIL for a 32 hour round trip road trip in less than a month.

Stephanie said...

Hm, if I could do anything consequence-free, I'd get my hands on a boatload of money, pay of all my bills, go shopping and buy a nice apartment.

And, umm, I think you forgot the part in your post where you give instructions on how to live consequence-free. Update, please? :)

marisa rose said...

I want to eat cookies for breakfast and not instantly feel chubby.

Anonymous said...

I want to tell my boss to shove it and not get fired

And trust...Spitzer's wife is taking care of business! She is a scorned woman afterall.

Jess said...

I want to wake up morning and be thin without anyone being like, Um, what the hell happened?!

Annie said...

I feel bad for Spitzer's family. I mean, who knows what's going on that isn't in the press?

I'd like to accept the fact that I'm working 1000 times harder than he is... and not feel selfish for thinking it.

Julie said...

I want to be able to live without worrying about money.

I want to live outside the country for awhile.

I also want to punch Spitzer in the face.

Anonymous said...

I want to eat an entire BOX of girl scout SAMOA cookies and not gain a pound.

An entire box...or two. hehe.

Anonymous said...

I want to be able to tell everyone exactly how I feel at the exact moment I'm feeling it and the person won't get offended.

Angela Noelle said...

If you figure out the secret to that Thin Mint thing, be sure to let me know!

The Dutchess of Kickball said...

I want to do something (most likely illegal) that will grant me some pretty easy and yet tons of money without consequences.

PomJob said...

"I want to punch Eliot Spitzer in the face (because apparently his wife won't) and not get arrested."

You might be able to do this one, as long as you hold a press conference to express your disgust in yourself and then resign from your job. The Today Show mentioned several times that they don't think he'll be prosecuted, because he's been embarrassed enough. THAT's what makes me mad: he lost his job, so he should be able to evade the legal system? WTF?!

I'd also love to eat a box of Tagalongs, the chocolate peanut butter cookies. Yum!

Charm City Kim said...

I want to tell my mother in law that she's ridiculous and have her finally understand my point of view!!

I want to enjoy my first year of marriage without having everyone ask me when we're having kids!

longredcape said...

I so want to skip a mortgage payment to buy clothes (& shoes! & bags!), too :( It's going to be awfully tempting when I go to Tallahassee next week. My hotel is .5 miles from the mall.

longredcape said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
longredcape said...

I so want to skip a mortgage payment to buy clothes (& shoes! & bags!), too :( It's going to be awfully tempting when I go to Tallahassee next week. My hotel is .5 miles from the mall.

B said...

gah! You and me BOTH. Seriously.

Anonymous said...

I want to be able to eat cupcakes and nothing else and not get sick.

Yoda said...

Pardon the engineer in me. Your car's horse power has nothing to do with high speed! The HP rating is a measure of how fast you could get to 80 mph. :-)

The Scions 160HP is quite impressive given that its a compact car! I'm sure it feels almost as powerful as a BMW (even tho it has lesser HP), coz its a lot lighter! Good buy :-)

Tonya said...

wow, i pretty much agree with all of those things! but let's see...i want to go on a fab vacation around the world on someone else's dime.

Elise said...

I want the Blue Bell ice cream I am eating AT THIS VERY MOMENT to not show up in the form of fat anywhere on my body.

cdp said...

you ARE a machine!

ps, I don't think anyone would bother to arrest you for punching our beloved spitzer in the face. seriously.

Katelin said...

Man I would love to eat a whole sleeve of thin mints too...mmmmm.

Rachel H. said...

Yeh, all those things sound REALLY good, especially the Girl Scout Cookies, the stay out late and drinking and the skip paying your rent! Sound amazing!

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with you on all of these. Where is one of those magic lamps with a genie when you need it?

christa p said...

ugh eliot spitzer - like we need more scandal here in nys. we have enough, thank you very much mr spitzer.

i want to go on vacation some place warm, and not care abouthow much it costs, or the fact that I am self employed and there is no one else around to cover for me.

i want to eat girl scout cookies now...

i want to lose my catholic guilt
(which is actually part of the song, ironically)

i want to do a millions things...

So@24 said...

Also, on the list of shitty ways to start your week has got to be standing next to your philandering governor husband while he publicly apologies for fucking another woman. Er, prostitute. And you have to stand there and be supportive while the cameras snap snap snap away.

I would've paid a lot of money (read: 3 bucks) to hear her internal monologue during that press conference.

Larissa said...

Dude, you're the fifth person to mention Girl Scout Cookies to me today. Must...not...give...in...

Anonymous said...

I actually have listened to Great Big Sea, how exciting. I also wish i could tell evil bitches to shove it consequence-free, too. I think we should have 1 days per year where this is a national rule or something. Just ettiquette, not criminal acts.

Vanessa said...

I want to be able to move back to Manhattan without financial consequences then I may want to go live on the west coast for a while again too.

miss jo ladie said...

thanks for your comments.

here are my wants:

I want to NOT wake up in the morning and go to work.

I want to NOT be a responsible adult and instead just enjoy my day w/o worries of cleaning and cooking.

is that too much to ask?

Um... Yum! said...

I think you can test your car out in Montana or North Dakota or even in Tennessee where the speed limit on the interstate is 70, so going 80 is fine. :oD

I think you can also go to these places to punch Eliot Spitzer in the face.

Princess Pointful said...

Yes please, on all counts.
And I want one of those Cadbury Bunnies in my house.

Ashley said...

I want to eat a huge piece of CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE DOUGH CHEESECAKE and The Cheesecake Factory and not worry at all about calories. I don't understand people who say it is too sweet, are you kidding me? Give me two!

Thanks God for my enormous sweet tooth.

Maxie said...

this is sad... but I actually DID eat a whole tube of thin mints. I just couldn't help myself!

L Sass said...

I want to tell my boss that I think he's a total joke as a manager and not get fired!