Thursday, February 14, 2008

I Confess - I Have A Valentine

It's Valentine's Day. The Hallmark holiday where they jack up the price of roses to $400 a dozen and make you call ahead for dinner reservations 6 months in advance. No, I'm not a skeptic. I actually really love the holiday; I just think it's hilarious how corporate America has used it to its advantage. Smart really.

My fondest memories of Valentine's Day growing up were from high school. You were able to buy carnations for $1 and have them delivered to students during classes. Always wondering who you'd get them from. There were cut out paper hearts hung all over the school with the name of every student (and believe me there were 600 in my graduating class alone so that's a lot of hearts) and my goal was always to find the heart with my boyfriend's name on it and carry it with me all day. It was the time when stuffed animals, big heart shaped balloons and over-sized cards weren't corny or cheesy.

I miss the innocence of that time, but I don't miss the immaturity of teenage love. Relationship problems were advertised throughout the school, couples would fight loudly in the hallway, then you'd see them making out later during lunch period. Crushes weren't ever secret and it would always be your worst enemy that found out you liked the tall boy in your 2nd period English class. No, I definitely don't miss that.

This year I am looking forward to Valentine's Day not for the flowers and chocolates, but for a rekindled romance. Clancy and I rang in the wee hours of the New Year together talking about the possibility of working things out. That we missed each other and thought maybe things could be different. I have only hinted about it on my blog until now 1.) out of respect for him and not sharing every detail of our relationship with the world and 2.) because I wanted to enjoy the butterflies in secret - at least for a short while. It made it all the more exciting.

So I will spend this evening in the company of someone I really care about. Someone who I know really cares about me. And isn't that what Valentine's Day is all about?

Happy Valentine's Day, Clancy.

P.S. I like you ;)

70 comments:

JulyBug said...

Wow, that was unexpected! Have a wonderful, chocolate filled day!

Stephanie said...

I admire you for taking a big leap of faith and trying to work things out with Clancy. ENJOY this Valentine's Day with the guy who gives you butterflies. :)

nancypearlwannabe said...

Wow, that's a Valentine's surprise! Happy heart day Michelle.

nancypearlwannabe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
brandy said...

I remember reading something about this rekindlement on Nicole's site (topic- fill in the blank 'most people don't know...), but was wondering when you were going to make a mention here. I'm thinking if you are happy, then I'm happy. And being happy is what matters most right?

Wow. I'm using the word happy a lot today. Well, let's do it again- happy Valentine's Day!

tiff said...

here's to second chances and working it out. Happy Valentines day!

The Dutchess of Kickball said...

Aw that is so exciting. Congratulations, I wish you guys the best.

Nilsa S. said...

Oh the carnation days - man you bring back the memories!

And that's the wonderful thing about YOUR blog - you get to chose what you share and what you don't. And none of us can be mad at you for it!

grungedandy said...

Aha I wondered if I read between the lines right I left a rather cryptic comment last time & just hoped you’d understood it with out giving the game away as I didn’t want to pry as it’s none of my business till you make it my business. As I said when I very first de lurked I’ve had my heart broken twice once didn’t work out (it went soooo bad it almost put me off men) the second one I’m still with 11 years & counting some times they need the second chance to see what they are missing . I clung on to this at the time don’t know where it came from or who it’s by but I had it on my wall for the 4 month we were apart.
“If you love something let it go, if it comes back, it’s yours. If it doesn’t, it never was”
Anyhoo glade you’re both happy with where you’re at, congratulations. Remember you always have my email add. Seeya Hugya *G*

the fanny said...

I'm so happy you're working things out. Enjoy it! Happy V Day!

:)

3carnations said...

I'm glad you're spending Valentine's Day with someone you care about.

We did the carnation delivery thing, too. I never got one. Somehow that doesn't matter anymore. :)

lspoon said...

Aww yay! Have a great day with the one you like :)

KS said...

good luck! :)

dreamgrrl said...

oh i loved HS valentine's days... memories.....
Have a great day and congrats on your butterflies, im so glad you shared with us finally!

Jess said...

I have been wondering when you were going to talk about this! But I totally understand your reasons for not. And I'm glad that things are going well between you two. Enjoy your Valentine's Day!

Jenni said...

All I can say is OMG!!! This is too weird...I seriously think we are leading parallel lives!!! :)

I truly hope everything works out for you...maybe you'll be the next one with a ring on your finger!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

erin said...

like Jess, I was wondering too! i'm glad you're trying to work things out (and that you still have butterflies)!

brookem said...

You know what, you sound HAPPY, and I'm so happy that you're happy.

Have a good night tonight with him. You deserve it.

xo

Hope said...

Oh my god! I am in shock. In complete shock.

Happy Valentine's Day, my dear. And I really, really hope things work out ! Really.

Gretta James said...

Have a fab valentines day hun xx

m said...

hey michelle,
i know you're excited to get back with the ex, but i just want to warn you, that there was a reason, a real reason, why you guys broke up in the first place.
remember all that pain and hurt you went through. and the discoveries you made about being in denial and thinking everything was great when it wasn't, etc etc.

i just can't help but think you deserve better. and i'm sure it'll be exciting for several weeks in the beginning because it's all relatively new again, but the old problems will resurface. and you'll remember why it ended in the first place.

all i'm saying is, be cautious, wary, and make sure he knows, like seriously knows, how freaking lucky he is that you're taking him back.

that is all.

(ps- and think of it from the guy's point of view. it's like, here's this girl whose heart i BROKE and let her go, just like that. no explanation. kicked her out of the apt. made her cry. even her blog was dedicated to the demise of our relationship. and NOW i changed my mind and she easily takes me back. boy do i have power).... or something like that.

sorry if this is cynical, but i see it happen so many times (getting back with an ex) and it's ended badly more times than it's ever ended happily.

kisses and hugs from the east coast!

cady said...

oh how i remember the carnations...haha..i was thinking from what i had read that maybe you guys had worked things out. you seem happy, and i'm happy for you. happy valentine's day!

Nic said...

I'm so happy for you!

Rebecca said...

I loved the carnation thing! In our high school there was one color to send to friends and another to send to "special friends." OMG, the excitement of 3rd period when they got delivered. Loved it. Of course, even then I realized that this ritual was super harsh for those that did not get any flowers.

legallyheidi said...

hehe i used to send myself carnations :X well....only twice. and once was because i had gotten dumped the night before.

I'm all for second chances, but just be careful because like m says you break up for a reason but that being said...people make mistakes and people change :) The only thing that really matters is that you do what makes you really happy.

Happy Valentines day!! :)

She Likes Purple said...

Is this your ex-boyfriend or a past guy you dated? The one you lived with? Regardless, I'm happy for you. You deserve happiness.

A Margarita said...

Aww, how sweet! That's really the spirit of Valentine's Day, and I think you guys captured it :) Have a fantabulous day!

ChasingParadise said...

We had big red hearts with our names on it that we got to give away to our Valentine. I wore B's name around my neck senior year. That was fun, and innocent.

I still love this day for the chocolates. What are you thinking, woman?!

Also, Happy Valentine's Day to you and Clancy. I'm glad it's worked out for you :)

survivingmyself said...

clancy is a weird name.

Le Petit Chic said...

So happy for you, honey! Have a great Valentine's Day :)

amanda rae said...

wow, that's so exciting! i hope you have an awesome valentine's day!!

-a

These Little said...

I already knew (hehe!) but am so happy for you. Here's to a rekindled romance on this happy day. xoxo

thecasualperfectionist.com said...

Claire and I hope you have a wonderful Valentine's Day, Michelle!

:)

lfar said...

I'm afraid I'm with m. It's easier for me to comment "hooray! all the best!" but it's the cynic deep inside me that wonders how all the previous reasons could be gone. Also I have a terrible amount of pride, and could never give that much status to somebody else; the status of "you hurt me and I'm still yours"

love love!

Daddy Dan said...

I'm happy for you and I hope things work out.

Happy Valentine's Day

Virginia said...

Happy Valentine's Day Michelle!! I totally understand the leap of faith you're taking...you know I've been there too. Whatever is meant to happen will happen, and I wish nothing but the best for you guys!

The Smarter Princess said...

In the spirit of high school memories..."Michelle and Clancy sitting in a tree!"

I'm very happy for you! Enjoy your valentine!

Maria said...

congratulations!

happy valentine's day!

Yoda said...

You know the best thing about getting back together with a long time ex? The sex. They know *exactly* how to rock your boat.

LOL!

Happy V-day! Where are you guys going for dinner?

thegirlfromtheghetto said...

I really love this day, too, but society and the women in my office wreck it for me. Congrats on having another go at love!!!

If you want to check out my posting about my Valentine's Day, feel free.

Angela said...

Oh, Michelle! I'm so thrilled for you :) :) :)

I hope you have a very, very happy Valentine's Day, and you know I've been where you are now, so if you ever need to talk, you know where to find me!

Trish Ryan said...

That's exciting! Have a wonderful Valentine's day...may it exceed your expectations in every way :)

distractedspunk said...

Michelle, I think you already know just how well I understand where you are. It's a fine line navigating the things that pulled you apart in the first place and the things that pulled you back together. I don't think I need to warn you about being cautious - this is something you both want.

I may not be with mine anymore, but I'm still right here beside you, taking baby steps, and you can always call on me if you need me. I truly understand how even in the highest of highs, there are still those fears of "What if it happens again?"

Either way, I wish you a wonderful Valentine's Day, and I hope for future romance and love for both of us.

k said...

yay to a very exciting valentines day!

ahh, those carnations. i remember them fondly.

mcgee said...

if you're happy lady, then i'm happy for you. i wish you all the best in trying to work out.

but. if he ever hurts you again? i'll be waiting to give him a swift kick in the balls with my pointiest pair of stilettos.

i'm just sayin' is all.

mcgee said...

work IT out obviously. you don't need to work out. you're hot as you are.

Susie said...

Wow, congrats and have fun!! But obviously be careful too :)

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Princess Pointful said...

Happy Valentine's Day, my dear!
I'm glad you are feeling happy and well-loved again.
I, too, however, am a little bit cautious on your behalf (not because I don't trust you, but because I adore and respect you too much)-- I hope he knows how much he almost lost.

Princess Extraordinaire said...

WOW! That is wonderful Michelle and I hope that you two have a romantic evening together with lots of shared memories...

Katelin said...

Hope you have a most wonderous Valentine's Day! :)

janet said...

oooooh secrets being revealed! :) we all love a little mystery! happy v-day my dear

Auburn Kat said...

I'll be spending Valentine's day with my family, better than a man!

Christa said...

yay! i am all about the second chance romance. since my second chance romance is now my lifelong fairytale! so YAY MICHELLE AND CLANCY!

happy valentines day!

Deutlich said...

awww, that's just all sorts of awesome. enjoy that and happy v-day!

MaM said...

Have an awesome time!
I've just started reading your blog, I love it.
It's smart, sassy and makes me laugh! Everything I need in a day full of work !!

So@24 said...

Valentines what now?

thestoryofagirl said...

FINALLY! I was wondering when you were going to spill it on here! The longer you went, the more surprised I was, and what a wonderful way to let us know! On a that's *supposed* to be about love.

:-D Heart you.

chasinglibby said...

ah! the proverbial cat is out of the bag for all! :D have a LOVEly day. hehe.

j said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Kate said...

Hmm. Ouch! I think he's cute, btw!

I admire you for giving him another chance. I don't think you're making the easy decision- it's obvious from your posts that's not who you are. And because of that, I trust you to protect yourself. And if he hurts you again, an army of bloggers from all over the world will be calling for castration!

:-) Happy V Day! And enjoy love!

Miss A said...

Okay, I am with the chorus of the select few who feel cautious about your confession to us. With that said, you really could have blown me down with a feather when I read this post! And what excuse does he have for throwing the "yay michelle has left my house" party?

Anyhow, I respect your feelings and decisions and I hope that it works out for the best - for YOU.

Happy Valentines
xxx

pessimisticredhead said...

I hope your night was awesome! I'm happy for you two :)

Julie said...

Hope you had a great Valentine's Day.

Tim came home from work at 10pm and I hadn't noticed how late it was because I had been playing Super Mario Galaxy on Wii....

Yea a little addicted.

:)

PrincessPolly said...

I realised you were back with him a while back when you left it as the secret you hadn't told anyone on someone's blog comments, I'm happy you're officially "out" now! :) As I myself have gone through the breaking up and getting back together thing with my boyf, I think sometimes rekindled romances are better than new romances, as it FEELS new but you have the familiarity at the same time, and the opportunity to learn from any mistakes either of you made in the past. I'm so happy for you and wish you all the best! :)

Ashley said...

She finally confesses it to the masses :) I'm so happy for you, I really hope things work out for the best with you two, you deserve it lady! :)

ashley said...

Congrats! I'm so happy for you. And what a cute name...Clancy. I hadn't even realized that you were with anyone. Wow. Amazing.

k said...

that's so sweet. hope you guys are doing well.

L Sass said...

Wow! Exciting news!! I hope you two had a wonderful Valentine's Day and I can't wait to hear how things work out.

Passionista said...

I was totally shocked! I think its so brave of you to post about it on your blog. It's great to have a Valentine's. I don't know how your relationship was before but I hope its better now. Of course, guard your heart and stay aware. You are a fabulous person with or without him :)

Lisa said...

Hey, Michelle. This makes me the 70th comment. Awesome. I'm really ridiculously happy you're happy (you so deserve it), but I'm also a little concerned. Then again, all 70 of us will beat him to a bloody pulp if he ever hurts you again. We love you that much.